The Stray Cat Standoff

Letting Go of Control

A few days ago, I posted a note about a staring contest I had with a local stray cat.

I’m not sure what we were negotiating, but I blinked first. Which means, at least in his mind, he now owns me.

The note got a better response than I expected.

So I thought I’d take the opportunity to expand the note into something more, because maybe it wasn’t just about a cat after all.

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We fight these invisible battles every single day.
With people. With traffic. With the Wi-Fi.

Especially with ourselves.

And we tell ourselves: “I can’t lose. I need to win.”

But here’s what struck me: when I blinked, of course, nothing happened. It was just a humorous event. The cat wasn’t looking for something from me, except maybe a snack or two.

He/she just strutted off, smug as ever, the way cats do.

I was left wondering why we all seem to feel like losing desperately matters.

So much of our stress comes from needing to prove something.
To be right. To come out on top.

But what if the real strength isn’t in winning, it’s in knowing when to let go?

When you blink first, the world doesn’t end. You free yourself.

Free from the weight of needing to win every argument.
Free from chasing validation.
Free from the illusion that control equals safety.

The Stoics said: “You have power over your mind—not outside events.”

That’s the real win.

Not clinging to control.

But walking away lighter, smiling, because you finally realized, you don’t have to win everything

In the end, the cat walks away, and so do we. The only thing that lingers is the choice: cling to control, or give in to peace.