Avoidance Doesn’t Always Look Like Fear

There’s a version of avoidance that looks nothing like fear.
It looks responsible.
Focused.
Even productive.

You tell yourself, “I’m just thinking it through.”
Or “Now’s not the right time.”
But deep down, you already know - you’re stalling. Quietly. Intentionally.

I’ve caught myself doing it more than once.
Not because I don’t know better.
But it’s incredibly easy to trick yourself when you’re calm, functional, and in motion. That’s the worst kind of avoidance - because it doesn’t feel like avoidance.

Here’s how I know I’m doing it:

• I fill my time with low-resistance tasks

• I over-research instead of deciding

• I say “I need more clarity” when I need more courage

These are subtle patterns, not meltdowns.
But they steal months. They wear down momentum. And they keep you trapped in the illusion that progress is happening, when really, you’re circling.

What helps me is to pause and ask myself one question:

“If I had to move forward today, what would I already know to do?”

That question cuts through the fog.
Because usually, clarity isn’t the issue. Permission is.

What I wrote this week:
These two posts dig into the mental noise we’ve all wrestled with lately:

• “That Inner Critic Spiraling Out of Control?”
A 2-minute way I catch myself before that spiral takes over.

• “You Are A Fraud! (The Voice In Your Head Thinks You Are)”
On imposter syndrome, internal noise, and why you’re not crazy for hearing it.

From this week:
I heard this in a podcast, and it stuck:

“Most people don’t fear failure. They fear being seen trying.”

In my experience, the exposure feels dangerous, not the outcome.
People delay sharing new projects, posting ideas, or speaking honestly.
Not because they’ll fail, but because someone might see them mid-process. Before it’s perfect. Before it’s safe.

But that’s where real growth happens - in public, while it’s still messy.
And the only way out is through.

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More next week,
Brad